KnK Chapter 3 Part 11

Shiki slowly appears. Fujino cannot believe her eyes. Shiki comes out directly in front of her, and far away too. Fujino does not notice but her fever is over 39 degrees now. She does not realize that the pain in her stomach is from a “certain condition”.

“… I see. …… You must be abnormal.”

Fujino can only think so. Fujino looks at Shiki and bends. Her vision distorts. The fulclum made in Shiki’s head and leg each twists in the opposite direction and twists Shiki’s body like a piece of rug.

… It should have twisted her.

Shiki, whose left arm is bleeding, nullifies Fujino’s “distortion” just by swinging the knife in her right hand. No…… she killed it.

“It’s hard to see those without shape but you used your power too many times. Now I can finally see them. Your power is a spiral of red and green. It’s really… beautiful.”

Fujino does not understand what Shiki is saying. The only thing she realizes is that Shiki will surely kill her now. Fujino repeatedly prays. Bend, bend, bend, bend. As Fujino glares so, Shiki swings her knife and eliminates the power. Fujino’s pain in her stomach is about to go over its limits.

“Who…… are you?”

Shiki answers Fujino’s fear with infinitely deep eyes.

“Everything in existence has an imperfection. Not to mention humans, but even in air, will, and time. It’s natural to have an end if it has a beginning. My eyes can see the death of things. They’re special like yours.”

Shiki looks at Fujino with eyes that Fujino felt was omnious before.

“That’s why… if it’s alive, I can even kill God.”

Shiki runs. It is graceful as if she is walking. She runs to Fujino and pushes her down onto the ground. Shiki get on top of her. Fujino shakes her throat at facing Death so close to her.

“Are you… going to kill me?”

Shiki does not answer.

“Why are you going to kill me? I only killed because my wound was hurting.”

Shiki laughs.

“That’s a lie. Then why are you laughing? That time before, and even now. Why do you seem so happy?”

Fujino hesitates. Fujino quietly places her hand on her own mouth.

…………… It’s bent.

She did not know because she does not feel anything, but she is certainly smiling……

My first murder.
… How did my face look in the pool of blood?

My second murder.
… How did my face look in the pool of blood?

I do not know but there was always an irritation. I was always irritated when I killed. Was that emotion… happiness? I could not even feel anything when I was raped, so I took pleasure in murder……?

“In the end, you were enjoying it. You like hurting others. That’s why that pain would never go away.”

It is because if the pain goes away, Fujino would have no reason to kill. The wound will continue hurting, for the sake of Fujino herself.

“……… That is…… the answer?”

Fujino murmurs. She does not want to accept it. She does not want to think about it. Because she must be different from Shiki……

“I told you, we are alike.”

Shiki’s knife moves. Fujino screams at the top of her lungs… For everything to bend.

The parking lot shakes. The ocean in the middle of the storm appears inside of Fujino’s mind. Withstanding the burning in her brain, Fujino makes a fulclum on each side of the bridge…

… And bends them…



A big noise as if a lightning came down occurs. The metal foundation creaks and screams. The ground tilts and the ceiling starts to collapse. Fujino blankly stares at the building that is about to collapse. The girl that was on her went down as the world suddenly tilted. There is a storm outside with ocean below. If she fell without being able to grab onto something, she will surely die. Fujino orders her body that is even having trouble breathing. She tells it that this place is going to collapse, so she has to get away from here. Dragging her body about to burn out, Fujino exits the parking lot. The shopping mall is relatively free of damage. The square corridor is now a rhombus.

Fujino walks, thinks she is walking… but falls. She cannot breath. Her legs would not move. Her head is in a daze and she cannot think. What is there is…… yes, only the strong pain inside of her. For the first time, Fujino thinks she is going to die. Because it hurts so much. This is unbearable. It’s better to just die rather than living on with this pain.

“…… *Cough*”

Laying face down, Fujino coughs out blood. On the ground, she is in a daze. In the vision that goes white, only her blood is clear. Red blood… red vision. The setting sun seems like it is burning… always seems like it is burning…

“No…… I do not… want to die.”

Fujino reaches out her arms. If her legs would not move, she will have to use her arms. Dragging her body, she inches forward. If she doesn’t do so, Death would come for her. Fujino keeps moving. All the senses in her are pain. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts… that is the only words she can think about. It is the feeling of pain she finally obtained, but she hates it now. But…… it is true. It hurts… it really hurts, so she wishes she does not want to die. She does not want to disappear. She has to keep living and do something. Because she have not done anything, left nothing behind…

That is too miserable.
That is too empty.
… That is too sad.

But it hurts. It hurts so much that the will to continue living might go numb and lose. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts. It hurts, but… … Fujino moves her arms while still coughing up blood. What she repeat are the same words. For the first time in her life, Fujino wishes strongly.
… I want to live longer.
… I want to talk longer.
… I want to love longer.
… I want to stay here longer……

But nothing moves now. Only the pain repeats. This is the true form of what she was enjoying. The truth hurts more than anything for Asagami Fujino. Now she truely understands the sins she has commited, the meaning of the blood she spilled. The meaning is so heavy that she cannot even apologize. She only recalls the kind smile. If that person was here… would he still hug me? Her body convulses. The blood coming up her throat tells her of the final pain about to come. That impact causes her light to go away. Now she can only see what is left in her. No, even that is fading away…… Not being able to stand the loneliness of disappearing, Fujino talks aloud. Her true will that she has hidden so stubbornly. … A small wish that she has dreamed of since she was small.

“……… It hurts. It hurts, Senpai. It really hurts… It hurts so much… I might cry… Mother, can I cry?”

… This is what she wanted to tell someone.
… If she could have said that on that day three years ago…

She cries. It hurts, it’s sad, and it’s so lonely that she can only cry. But just doing that eases the pain. That person has told her that pain is not something one bears but something one appeals to someone to love them. Fujino is thankful she met him… really thankful for being able to see him once again before this…

“Are you in pain?”

At the end of the pain, Shiki is standing. She has a knife in one hand. Fujino turns over to face Shiki.

“You should have said you were in pain if you were hurting.”

Shiki says so in the end. … It is the same words as in Fujino’s memory. “Certainly”, Fujino thinks. Even if she could say that starting now, she might not have came down this wrong road. That inconvenient, but normal life goes through her head. But she cannot. She has committed too many sins. She has killed too many people. … She has killed many people for the sake of her own happiness.

Asagami Fujino slowly stops her own breathing. Her sense of pain quickly disappears. So fast that she does not feel the pain of the knife stabbed in her chest.

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